


Shake Up Christmas

by TellHipHopImLiterate



Category: B.A.P
Genre: Christmas, M/M, minor!Choi Junhong | Zelo/Yoo Youngjae, past!Bang Yongguk/Kim Himchan, slight!Jung Daehyun/Kim Himchan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-25
Updated: 2014-12-25
Packaged: 2018-03-03 11:40:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2849603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TellHipHopImLiterate/pseuds/TellHipHopImLiterate
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's Christmas time. Which means drama, relationships, and a whole lot of deceiving. It's not Christmas without it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shake Up Christmas

Shake up the happiness  
Wake up the happiness  
Shake up the happiness  
It's Christmas time  
\- Shake Up Christmas – Train

 

Jongup could feel his teeth chatter as he continued to walk through snow. He needed to get home soon. It was almost close to Christmas and he wanted to finally get towards warmth and help his mom set up the Christmas tree. At least maybe they got a tree this year. They always saved up to get one, but they never have enough money. Maybe this year they will.

He turned the corner and saw the house they're renting with the Christmas lights still on, but some of the bulbs burnt out. They couldn't get new ones, so the old ones worked fine for now until they have enough money to afford new lights. Which was practically impossible since they're always saving money for other important things. He walked up to the house, took out his house keys, and unlocked the front door and entered inside. He saw his brothers in the kitchen already, with a couple of dollar bills on the table. Jongup reached into his pocket and grabbed a couple of wads of cash as well. He placed them on the table and looked at his two older brothers.

"So we have enough?" his older brother, Jonghyun, asked them.

"Let me count them first," Jongsung, the elder brother, told him.

Jongup waited and bit his lip. He heard the crinkle of the dollar bills and waited for the verdict.

"We have enough money for a very small tree," Jongsung announced.

"Better than last year," Jongup muttered.

"I know that, but since mom is spending the money on food and supplies for this Christmas, it's up to us to make this place look lively. Now, who's gonna get the tree?" Jongsung asked.

"I'll do it. I'm the only one with the car," Jonghyun offered, pocketing the money into his black leather wallet.

"And remember, get the cheapest tree there is. We saved a lot of money this year to be able to get some. And maybe we can get some new lights and decorations for the tree," Jongsung said.

"Do we have enough?" Jongup asked.

Jongsung shuffled a little, reaching into his pockets and holding out a wad of cash that made both Jonghyun and Jongup gasp at the amount.

"Where did you get this money?" Jonghyun asked him.

"Let's just say I'm not proud of what I've been doing. Jongup, you're in charge of getting the new decorations, okay. We need to make this home lively for mom. Who knows when she's going to be around for," Jongsung answered.

The two saluted him and pocketed the money into their wallets. When Jongsung said that, he meant that since she hasn't been eating so that it could keep her three boys alive and healthy, she's been getting sicker and sicker and she refuses to go to the hospital, saying that she can't afford the costs or that she's fine and doesn't need a doctor. Whatever the excuse was, she doesn't have long to live.

Anyway, Jongup walked towards his room that he shared with Jonghyun and placed his wallet in his secret stash. (Aka underneath his bed in an old lunchbox he had when he was in elementary school.) Jongup crawled into bed and snuggled up to the covers. It was only the two weeks before Christmas. There were so many things he had to do. For one, he had to save a lot more money in order to buy presents for his brothers and mother. Well technically, they would do Secret Santa like they did every year. Either way, Jongup wanted to save more money to buy more gifts for his family members.

"What are you thinking about?" Jonghyun asked him.

"Just thinking is all," he answered.

"What time do you have to go into work tomorrow?" Jonghyun asked.

"The job at the music shop wants me in at 8:45 in the morning while the library wants me there at 2:30 in the afternoon. I won't be home until possibly 6:30," Jongup answered, staring up at the ceiling.

"It's almost the Christmas season. You'll be incredibly busy at the music shop, I guarantee that," Jonghyun said.

"I know. Which means I need to reduce my hours at the library," Jongup said, closing his eyes.

"You like working there, don't you?" his brother asked him.

"More than anything. I love the feeling of the books in my hand, knowing that the person in front of me found the book they wanted. It's cheaper, too, for them to find the book and read them at the palm of their hands. If it's one thing humanity didn't fuck up, it's the library," Jongup stated.

Jonghyun chuckled. He knew his younger brother loved books. He said that they were the easiest and cheapest entertainments in the world. Jongup didn't have many friends, so he mostly relied on books to fill that in.

They both sat up when they heard someone entering the house, then a feminine voice called out to indicate that she's home. The two got up and walked towards the entrance of the house, where they saw their mom. She was shorter than them, with wild brown hair tied in a loose ponytail, tired brown eyes, a couple of wrinkles, and what looked like sunken cheeks.

"Hey, mom. How was work?" Jongsung asked her, taking her bags and coat.

"Ugh, tiring. The holidays are coming up soon, which means that the restaurants will be packed. Which also means that I won't be home that much since we're so under staff and the rush is getting extremely tiring," their mother told them.

"We know, mom. We'll be okay. We promise," Jonghyun told her.

Their mom sighed and sat down on a chair.

"I don't know what I did to deserve three perfect sons. I'm so proud of all of you," she said, holding onto Jongsung and Jongup's hands.

"You raised us like that mom. Trust us, we'll be okay," Jonghyun told her, placing his hands on her shoulders.

And just for that second, Jongup almost believed his older brother. Almost.

\-----

Yongguk swirled the red wine in his glass, staring at the one person who practically broke his heart across the room. He was laughing with someone else and whispering in the person's ear.

"Jealousy is a fickle thing, you know," a voice says, interrupting his thoughts.

He turns his head and sees his younger half brother, Junhong, staring at him.

"What do you know about jealousy?" Yongguk demands, taking a sip of his wine.

"Gee, I don't know, maybe the fact that I've had my fair share of lovers before and I know the feeling," he answered, staring at him.

"And what exactly, oh dear brother of mine, should I do about it?" Yongguk asked, looking at him.

"Make him jealous. Force him to see what he's missing," he answered.

"What, and use some poor soul like he's nothing? I can't do that," he stated.

"Look, do you want to make him jealous or not? It's not like you're gonna be in love with this idiot. All you're doing is getting Himchan back. Otherwise dad will force you into some messed up arrange marriage and nobody wants that," Junhong explained, taking a sip of the sparkling champagne.

Yongguk thought about it. Himchan was always the jealous type. If he's able to get him jealous, he can be able to get him back. But the problem with that is that he's going to have to use somebody. Without their knowledge. Well, he can tell them, but he's pretty sure that they wouldn't want to do this for the sake of being used.

"Yongguk! Merry Christmas," Himchan greeted, smiling widely at him while holding hands with another man.

"Merry Christmas. And who is this?" Yongguk asked, looking at the man beside him.

"This is Daehyun. He's my fiancé," Himchan introduced, showing a glittering stone on his left ring finger.

"Fiancé? When did you two meet?" Yongguk asked, gripping the wine glass a little too tightly.

"Just last year. We're thinking of getting married possibly next year before the holidays," Daehyun answered.

That was his and Himchan's plan. Yongguk stared at Himchan, who only smirked. Daehyun only looked at Himchan longingly.

"Well congrats. I'm sure that your wedding will be amazing," Yongguk said, lifting his wine glass for a toast to them.

"Thank you, Yongguk. Well, we must be off. We want to be able to avoid traffic as best as we can," Himchan said, dragging Daehyun away.

Junhong looked at his older brother. Yongguk finally broke the wine glass. He felt the red liquid dripping his fingers and the glass lodged into his palm. He didn't care, though. Himchan is doing this on purpose. He always did this.

"So are you going with my plan or are you going to sulk through the year?" Junhong asked him, picking up the shards of glass from the floor and taking out the pieces out of Yongguk's palm.

"He's doing this on purpose. He's trying to get something out of this," Yongguk said.

"I know he is, but you're still in love with him. Even after all these years of being without him," he pointed out.

"So how do I make him jealous?" Yongguk asked.

"Well, like I said, use someone. If you want to tell them, that's entirely up to you. I would suggest you don't, but like I said, that's up to you," he answered.

Yongguk stared at the door where Himchan and his new fiancé just left.

"To be honest, in order to make it more believable, I would suggest going for the using someone without their knowledge route. Oh, here comes mom," Junhong said.

For Yongguk, she's merely his step-mom. His dad married Junhong's mom and gave his dad a new son. He likes her, though. She's nice and kind, instead of bitter and angry like his own mom is whenever he visits her.

"There you two are. You father wants you two to be in the picture," his step-mom said, dragging the two towards his dad.

Junhong's mom looks almost like him, except she has soft brown hair, round cheekbones, light brown eyes, and thin lips. She wore a gorgeous and expensive gray silk dress that showed off her curves and black high heels.

"There you two are! I was beginning to think you two abandoned the party so early," his dad greeted.

"Of course not, dad. We were just roaming around," Yongguk said.

"I'm sure. Now come along and get in the picture with us," his dad said, motioning for his two sons to get into the picture.

The two stood next to their parents and forced a smile on their face, the flash of the camera going off.

 

I've been good this year  
The only thing I want is you to be here  
All my gifts can wait  
I don't believe in Santa Claus  
But I believe in us this holiday  
\- I Believe In Us (This Holiday) – A Rocket To The Moon

 

The Christmas holidays come and passed. They were able to get a nice tree, but it kind of die the two days after Christmas. In other words, it caught fire. They threw away the lights, ornaments, and tree away rather quickly, but their mom was ecstatic that day because she was able to spend Christmas with her three favorite men in the world. The boys are now putting in extra shifts, since they don't have school and they have every reason to continue working without any distractions. Jongup flipped a page in his book he's reading while making himself comfortable on the stool at the music shop. It was mostly slow, which gave him an excuse to continue reading his book.

Well, it was, until someone decided to enter the shop.

Seriously, who enters at nine in the morning?

Jongup ignored them and continued reading. He turned the page and heard someone clear their voice. He looks up and sees a handsome man in a tailored black suit with a clean white tie and his hair was neat and tidy.

"Can I help you?" Jongup asked in a bored, monotone voice while going back to reading his book.

"Well that was very rude. I would suggest you actually look up and greet me," the man told him.

Jongup marked his page and looked up, clearly annoyed.

"Can I help you?" he asked in a faux-like tone of happiness.

The man simply rolled his eyes. "I'm looking for an album that was just released. I placed an order on it," the man said.

Jongup placed the bookmark on the page and closed it. He got up from the hard stool and went back to find said package. There were three of them there. He grabbed the three and brought them towards the front.

"We have three packages today. Two for a Lee Seunghyun and another for a Bang Yongguk," Jongup read them off.

"Bang Yongguk," the man stated.

"Identification, please," he told the man.

"That's simply outrageous. I'm sure that if I said my name is Bang Yongguk, you should believe me," the man told him.

"It's company policy sir. So unless you are Bang Yongguk, I need to see some identification," Jongup told him.

Jongup could tell by this man's irritation that he didn't want to give any identification whatsoever. The man reached for his wallet and took out his driver's license. Jongup inspected it and only gave a slight nod. He handed the man his package, as well as his driver's license.

"Will that be all, sir?" Jongup asked, emphasizing on the sir just to piss him off.

The man – Yongguk – rolled his eyes and let the music store. Jongup only snickered and continued on reading his book. All in a day's work.

\-----

"You should have seen this little prick. He had the nerve to ask me for ID. Doesn't he know my father owns that record store?" Yongguk ranted to Junhong.

Junhong, who looked extremely bored and nibbling on a French fry, only looked sympathetic. Not to his older half brother, of course.

"Look, he had the right to do so. What if someone was impersonating you or something? To be honest, I wish you were ranting about Himchan instead of this guy," Junhong admitted.

Yongguk only glared. Not only was his younger brother being unsympathetic, but he had the nerve to side with the prick his dad hired to be at the register. Like, who does that guy think he is? And then he had to bring up his ex, who is getting marred two days before Christmas.

"You're not helping," Yongguk stated.

Junhong ate two more French fries before giving his reply.

"Look, why don't you just complain to dad. That's always been your specialty. That way you can get the guy fired for all I care," he stated.

"That's the opposite of what I want. I just want him to get told off by dad that he has to give his one hundred percent. It was like he wanted to be anywhere but there," he pointed out.

"Why don't you work there? Show him the ropes and everything. Dad has been trying to get you to work there for years. You already know how everything works. Maybe it will do you some good," Junhong suggested.

Working? That struck Yongguk with an idea.

"Maybe I should. I could show that little prick how to handle everything," he said to himself.

Junhong said nothing and continued to eat Yongguk's fries. He wasn't eating them, so he might as well steal them.

After lunch, Yongguk walked into his father's office. He knocked on the door to signal that he was there.

"Enter," his father said, motioning for Yongguk to enter.

He entered his father's office. He always thought it was eerie.

"Yongguk! What can I do for you?" his father asked, setting down the newspaper he was reading.

"I was wondering if I can work at the music shop," he said.

"Why the sudden interest? I remembered clearly last year that you refuse to work in a dingy place like that," his father recalled.

"I changed my mind. I would like to work there."

His father hummed.

"I know what you're doing, you know. You want to show up that kid at the record store," his father stated.

Yongguk's jaw dropped. How did he know?

"Pick your jaw back up, son. I've known you since you were a child. You always want to show up someone who did you wrong. Whether it was to push you in the dirt or punching you in the face," his father told him.

Yongguk said nothing and played with his fingers.

"I hope you know that you'll only be working until Christmas," his father stated.

That perked up his head.

"Are you serious?" he asked.

"Sure. It's about time the kid began to show a bit of respect. He's a great cashier, but a terrible worker sometimes. On his good days, he's great. Work there for a couple of days, show him more of the ropes, and then come back to me and report how he's doing. Think you can do that?" his dad asked.

Yongguk only nodded his head.

"Yes sir, I can," Yongguk replied.

"Good. You start tomorrow," his dad said, going back to his newspaper.

Yongguk walked out of his office and out the door. He'll show that kid up. He'll work that little prick into shape that he'll regret being rude to him and his customers.

\-----

Jongup was humming to himself, stacking the CDs back to where they belong. It was an American song from the 70s that's been stuck in his head.

"A B C. It's easy as, 1 2 3. As simple as, do re mi. A B C, 1 2 3. Baby, you and me girl. A B C. It's easy as, 1 2 3. As simple as, do re mi. A B C, 1 2 3. Baby, you and me girl," he hummed.

It was his boss's idea to perform more American songs through the speakers. It annoyed him a little, but he got used to it and now these songs have been trapped into his head.

He finally finished stacking the last of the CDs and smiled in his small accomplishment.

"That's wrong," a voice said.

He turned around and saw the same man from a few days ago. He furrowed his eyebrows. What kind of right does this man have to tell him what to do?

"Excuse me?" Jongup asked.

"You heard me. The CDs are placed all wrong. It should be in alphabetical order by name and album. Obviously you didn't follow that rule," he said.

Jongup stared at him. He looked at the albums.

"They're in chronological order by years. It makes it easy for the person to find it instead of shuffling through CDs and records by alphabetical order," Jongup argued.

"It's still wrong. Do it again," he said.

"You're not my manager," he stated.

"I am now," the man stated, showing his ID tag.

Jongup looked at the name. It said 'Bang Yongguk' in bold black letters. Right underneath it, however-

Shit.

Jongup bit his tongue to release a groan. He turned his back and began to re-shuffle all the CDs again. It was a pain in the ass already. He stacked and re-stacked until it was finally to Yongguk's liking.

"Am I done?" Jongup asked.

"Sure," Yongguk said, sitting behind his own register. Jongup stood behind his own and took out a book for him to read. It's a weekday, meaning that it's going to be extremely slow.

He heard a bell ring and looked up. He saw a pale looking kid with black hair and was about a few inches shorter than the door. Kid was fucking tall.

"There you are. Dad told me that you were working here," he greeted, walking up to Yongguk.

Dad? Jongup thought.

"What do you want?" Yongguk asked him, stacking up to the higher shelves.

"Mom wants to know if you'll be joining us for lunch. What time do you get off?" the kid asked.

"In a few minutes, give or take. By the way, dad wants the numbers for the shop. Give this to him and tell him I'll see him for dinner," Yongguk said.

Jongup turned around and furrowed his eyebrows.

"Okay. I'll see you in a few minutes. Hey Jongup," he greeted.

Jongup greeted back. He knew Junhong a little. He always came by, talked to him a bit, and then asked for the numbers for the shop. He didn't know the kids name, but the kid always knew his name. Mostly because of the name tag on his shirt.

"Your dad owns this store," he told Yongguk.

Yongguk only hummed and wrote down something on the clipboard. Jongup only rolled his eyes. The sooner he's done with his job, the sooner he can leave and head on toward the library to work. He sat down on the hard stool and opened a book.

"No reading on the job," Yongguk told him.

Jongup glared at him.

"There's hardly anyone here. It's not like anyone is going to come in here and rob us," I said.

"That's what you think. You never know who might come in! Maybe some kids you are going to steal some of the CDs or something," Yongguk said.

"First of all, the store has a detector to announce that someone is going to steal something. Second, no one is going to steal CDs in here. Trust me, I know. Third, the only person that's seriously taking their job seriously is you. So stop with that pretentious attitude and leave me alone," Jongup snapped, going back to reading his book.

Yongguk rolled his eyes and went to the back to begin restocking some CDs.

"Excuse me," someone said.

Jongup looked up from his book. It was a male, a few years older than him he believes. He has brown doe eyes, puffy lips, and an eye mole underneath one of his eyes.

"Can I help you?" Jongup asked, placing the bookmark on his page.

"I just need to buy this. Mine and my fiancé's anniversary is coming up and I know how much he loves classical music," he said.

He only nodded his head and began to scan the three items that the man brought forward. After scanning them, Jongup began to use the register and typed in the enter key.

"That'll be $47.92," Jongup read off.

The man gave him a fifty dollar bill, which he inspected. Once he saw that the dollar bill was real, he added it in the register and heard the ringing of the register.

"Would you like a bag?" Jongup asked him, taking the change out.

"Yes please," he requested.

Jongup only nodded his head and took out a bag. He stuffed the CDs inside, along with the receipt and the change. He handed it to the male.

"Thank you sir, and have a good day," Jongup said, giving him a small smile.

The male smiled back and began to leave the store. Right when he left, Yongguk appeared beside him.

"What happened?" he asked.

"Someone came in and bought three classical music CDs. Said it was almost his and his fiancé's anniversary. I didn't dive too deep into it," Jongup stated as he continued to read.

Yongguk rolled his eyes and continued to restock the CDs.

 

Wrap me up like a present and put me away,  
and when it gets cold I'll be yours  
Let the bells ring on a fool's holiday  
I swear that I'm more than just broken promises,  
decorations can change like tinsel and ribbon so  
Do not open 'til you've got forever to spend  
with me on a fool's holiday  
\- Fool's Holiday – All Time Low

 

"So how did it go?" Junhong asked him when Yongguk stepped into his house.

"How is it that you always enter my house without a key?" Yongguk asked, taking off his jacket and setting it down on the chair.

"You don't make it easy in hiding your spare key. I mean, on top of the doorframe? Really? A bit cliché if you ask me," he said. "Anyway, you didn't answer my question."

"It was fine. The boy is still a prick," Yongguk answered.

"I spoke to him, though. He's not that much of a prick. I don't think he really likes you," he said.

"Fantastic," he said dryly.

"You know, if you still want to make Himchan jealous, you can use Jongup in this master plan of yours," Junhong suggested.

Yongguk stared at him like he grew three extra heads.

"Yeah, that's not going to happen. He's a terror and a prick. He has no sympathy for the store and he barely gives his effort in his job," Yongguk stated.

"That's his morning job. He's always like that. It's his afternoon job that he loves more," Junhong explained.

"What afternoon job?" he asked.

"He works at the nearby library He loves working there and he loves the joy of books. He told me that when I asked him if he had any other job. You should've seen the look on his face when I asked him about it," Junhong stated.

"Your point?" Yongguk asked.

"He's not that bad of a guy. If you would actually give him a chance and maybe ask him out, the sooner that you and Himchan will get back together," he explained.

Yongguk thought about it. Sure, he wanted to make Himchan jealous, but why would Junhong recommend that brat?

"Be nice to him. If you're nice to him, then maybe he'll open up to you a bit more," Junhong suggested.

Yongguk rolled his eyes, but eventually agreed. He needs to have some sort of bonding relationship with his workers, as his father puts it. He might as well try anyway. It wouldn't kill him.

\-----

Yongguk decided to follow his younger brother's advice. He decided to be a little bit nicer to the younger. Jongup was reading another book on the counter, barely paying attention to what's going on in front of him.

"Hey, it's almost lunch time. We can go and get something," Yongguk offered him.

Jongup picked his head up and raised an eyebrow.

"Are you okay?" Jongup asked him.

"I wanted to apologize for the way I've been treating you. Is it wrong for me to ask if we can get something to eat?" Yongguk asked.

Jongup stared at him as if he got three heads.

"Cut the bullshit. You want something from me," Jongup told him.

"Can't a man apologize without being interrogated?" he asked.

Jongup continued to stare at him.

"Alright fine. I'm trying to make my ex-boyfriend jealous. My brother suggested using you for the bait, even though I told him it'll never work," Yongguk confessed.

"I'll do it. For fifty bucks," Jongup offered.

"You've got to be out of your fucking mind," he said.

"Fifty is nothing to you rich folks. Tell you what, you give me fifty dollars an hour a week, depending how the day goes. I'll offer in a fake kiss, go to your stuffy dinner things, and whatever the fuck else you rich people do. I would even go with whatever bullshit lie you come up with. Sounds fair?" Jongup asked him.

Yongguk could feel his left eye twitch.

"I can't believe I'm making a deal with you," he said, holding his hand out.

Jongup only smirked. Yongguk wanted to punch him in the face.

The two let go and resumed going back to their jobs.

"I like lilacs and white chocolates," Jongup said, going back to reading his book.

"You get purple flowers with lavender or you get nothing," Yongguk stated.

Yongguk heard Jongup chuckle and smile. This is going to be a bad idea, he knows it.

\-----

Jongup sat down in Yongguk's living room, admiring the decorations inside. The entire house was probably bigger than his and his neighbor's house combined. Even the living room was bigger than his own room.

"Sorry it's not much. I tried to find a bigger place to live in, but this one was more closer to home," Yongguk greeted, entering with two mugs of something warm.

"I really hope you're joking," Jongup muttered, accepting the mug and drinking it. It's coffee alright, but it has that sweetness to it that he just can't seem to place.

"So if we're going to actually do this, we have to negotiate a plan," Yongguk told him.

"Just give me fifty dollars a week and I'll do whatever couple shit you want me to do," Jongup said.

Yongguk raised his eyebrows.

"What? It's fairly reasonable. Besides, I bet you won't even need that money anyway. It's probably like loose change to you," Jongup told him.

Yongguk sighed and thought about it.

"I'll give you fifty then. However, if we want to get this right, then that means we have to actually bond. We have to know each other very well and come up with a lie to say that we somehow met," Yongguk said.

"Easy. We met at the music shop when you were picking up something. It's truthful and a bit of a lie. Truthful because it's what happened, but a lie because you were kind of an asshole about it," Jongup stated.

"If I'm not mistaken, you were acting like a dick about it, too," he told him.

"It was company policy. We don't give shit away whenever we want. For all we know, someone was trying to steal your identity," Jongup stated.

Yongguk only rolled his eyes and began to make a list.

"So we need to talk about our likes and dislikes, where we grew up, what kind of lifestyle we live-"

"To be honest, this honestly sounds like we're actually dating. Are you sure you don't harbor some secret crush on me?" Jongup questioned.

Yongguk lightly shoved him. "Brat," he muttered.

Jongup only smiled. He was going to like this.

\-----

Jongup stood on the balls of his feet to look for the man. Jongup decided to arrive a few minutes early, since he did live a little farther away from where they were going to meet up.

"There you are," a familiar voice greeted.

Jongup looked up and saw Yongguk wearing a black pea coat, a pair of faded jeans, and a pair of boots. The weather was getting warmer, so Jongup opted from the coat. Now that he thinks about it, it's probably a bad idea to do so.

"So what are we doing?" Yongguk asked.

"You said you wanted to bond, right? What better way to bond than to watch a movie. We can pick from any of the selections that are playing," Jongup said.

Yongguk hummed and looked at the choices. They were mostly old American movies from the twenties or thirties.

"Which one do you want to see?" Yongguk asked him, looking at the different selections on the board.

Jongup looked at all the different choices. There were so many to choose from. He bit his lip and scanned over the titles.

"Casablanca seems like a good movie," Jongup answered.

"I've seen it before and it's actually a really good movie," Yongguk said.

Jongup ignored him and watched as Yongguk paid for the tickets. He was about to pull out his wallet to pay for his own, until Yongguk stopped him.

"No, don't do that. The movie's on me," Yongguk told him.

Jongup furrowed his eyebrows, but let him anyway. He wasn't used to that. He usually paid for his dates. He thought that he should at least do that. Even if this is all pretend, he still usually paid.

"I can still pay for my half," Jongup reasoned.

"Not happening. I asked you out, so I'm taking you out," Yongguk told him.

Jongup only nodded his head. He stuffed his hands in his pocket and shivered. It was almost the middle of March. The snow was barely melting, but that didn't mean that harsh winds made him shiver. He felt someone wrap their arms around him and pulled him close to their body. He looked up and saw Yongguk, a worry expression crossed his face.

"You're shivering. I don't want you to get sick," Yongguk told him.

Jongup only nodded his head and pocketed his ticket. The two began to walk inside the theater.

After the movie was over, the two began to walk out and began to reminisce their favorite scenes from the movie.

"I think my favorite is when the girl is going to take off in the flight and the man just lets her go," Jongup said.

"That's so stupid, though. He loves her, so why does he let her go?" Yongguk asked.

"Love is supposed to be selfless. You want to make the other person as happy as you want them to. It's putting someone else's needs before your own. Haven't you ever been in love?" Jongup asked him.

Yongguk thought about it. He only ever dated Himchan throughout his college years. High school was mostly about studying and his goal to be one of the top students in his class. He really didn't have time to really date.

"I don't know," he said honestly. He doesn't know what to make of Himchan. He does love him, but it wasn't the kind of love most people in books and movies would describe love. It was more like a forced love.

"Then what about Himchan? I thought you loved him," Jongup said.

"So did I, until I actually had to think about it," Yongguk confessed.

Jongup only hummed in response.

"Have you ever been in love?" Yongguk asked him.

"Once when I was in high school. He was really kind to me. He was funny, sweet, and smart. It was us against the world," Jongup said, reminiscing about his high school days.

"What happened?" he asked.

"We grew apart. He went to college while I stayed here and took odd jobs to support my family," he answered. "We tried to do long distance relationships, but it didn't really work out. We mutually broke it off. We were drifting away anyway. It didn't matter."

Yongguk only nodded his head. When he said he would bond with the younger, this wasn't what he had in mind.

"How about we get some ice cream? They said that you would know someone by what they order," Yongguk suggested.

"Sounds delicious. Let's go," Jongup said, walking towards his favorite ice cream shop ever.

Yongguk followed right behind him inside. They stood in line and waited patiently.

"Hi, how can I help you?" one of the workers asked.

"Hi. I'll take a chocolate waffle cone please," Jongup said politely.

Yongguk was surprised by the polite tone, but soon mentally shook the thought and looked at the flavors.

"I'll take a vanilla in a cup please," Yongguk said, taking out his wallet.

The worker nodded her head and punched in the order. After Yongguk paid for the ice creams, they stood to the side and waited.

"I always did peg you as a vanilla type of person," Jongup said, looking up at him.

"Gee thanks," Yongguk said dryly.

"You know what I meant. You're so plain and boring, but you're also a classic and could go with anything. It's not a bad thing being vanilla," Jongup explained.

"Yeah, but the way you make it sound makes it sound bad," Yongguk said.

Jongup ignored him and waited for his ice cream. After a few minutes, their order was called and they took their ice cream and left the ice cream parlor. Jongup licked the ice cream and savored the sweet taste in his mouth. Yongguk only took a spoon full and ate his. It was sweet.

"I haven't had ice cream since I was ten. This is a pleasant change," Jongup said, blushing lightly at the confession.

Yongguk only chuckled. To be honest, he doesn't remember the last time he ate ice cream either. It was so long ago. He watched Jongup enjoying his ice cream. Jongup then took a bite out of the ice cream, which Yongguk watched in amazement. Jongup looked up and raised an eyebrow.

"What?" Jongup asked.

"You should be feared," Yongguk blurted out.

Jongup snorted a laugh and covered his mouth. Yongguk noticed that there was a bit of chocolate ice cream on the side of his mouth.

"You have a bit of ice cream," Yongguk told him, pointing at the side of his mouth.

Jongup stuck his tongue out to try and get the leftover ice cream, but he failed and couldn't get it. Yongguk chuckled and took a napkin and dabbed it on the side of his mouth. After he got the dab of chocolate off the side of his mouth, he stared at Jongup's lips. They were so full and pouty looking.

"Um…," Jongup said awkwardly.

Yongguk jumped a little and threw away the napkin.

"Sorry," he muttered.

Jongup frowned and kissed Yongguk's cheek. Yongguk stared at him and furrowed his eyebrows.

"What was that for?" Yongguk asked.

"I'm trying to make it seem real. You look really cute flustered," Jongup commented.

"If you're trying to make it seem real, then do it right," Yongguk said, leaning down and kissing him.

The kiss tasted sweet like ice cream. After a few minutes later, the two pulled away and Jongup looked up at him.

"Yeah, you're definitely making this real," Jongup breathed out.

Yongguk bit back a smile. He let go of Jongup and he could feel his cheeks burning.

"Come on, old man. You're going to be in one hell of a ride for a while," Jongup tells him, taking another bite out of his ice cream.

"How do you do that?" Yongguk asked, cringing a bit at the sight.

"What? Biting ice cream? I used to do it a lot when I was a kid and I got used to it. Now your turn," Jongup said.

"Excuse me?"

"I told you something about myself. Now it's only fair that you do the same," Jongup explained.

Yongguk looked at his almost melting ice cream and scooped a bit in his spoon and took a bite.

"When I was four or five, my parents got divorced because my mom is a cheater and a liar and left me and my dad. He then remarried to my stepmom and that's how Junhong came along," Yongguk explained.

Jongup only nodded his head in response. He licked his ice cream and chewed a bit on the waffles.

"I'm allergic to raspberries," Jongup said, looking at the street signs.

"I'm not allergic to anything. At least, that's what my dad tells me," Yongguk says.

"Lucky. I wish I wasn't allergic to anything," Jongup muttered, eating the rest of the waffle cone.

Yongguk finished his ice cream in a cup and threw it away.

"So same time next week?" Jongup asked him, looking up at him.

"Sure, if I can find time. I have to go to some fancy dinner with my parents and lord knows those are boring as fuck," he said.

"I can be your date for these stuffy dinners. I bet I'll be a hit with your parents," Jongup said, stuffing the end bit of the cone into his mouth.

"I'm sure they'll love you," Yongguk said sarcastically.

"Damn right they should. I'm adorable," Jongup said with a mouth full of food.

"Not what I would use," Yongguk said.

Jongup only rolled his eyes.

"I'll be on my best behavior," Jongup said in a drawl.

"I'll pick you up at seven," Yongguk said, walking away from the younger.

Jongup waved goodbye to him and made his way towards his home.

 

We keep each other warm when winter kicks in  
This is my favorite season just because  
Of magic turns up loud  
And I just don't get how  
I could ever spend the 25th without  
Our mixtape for Christmas  
With all our favorite songs  
I'd stay here forever if you'll sing along  
Just us and the fire, we're swaying to the beat  
There's no place I'd rather be  
\- Mixtape for Christmas – Hey Monday

 

The party was stuffy and boring. Jongup has no idea why he even agreed. It was for some idiotic Easter party that honestly no one cares about. Then he realizes that they're rich and that they don't give a shit.

"Hello there," a woman greeted.

Jongup looked her over and saw she was maybe a few years older, with waist length black hair, a skimpy red dress that showed off her curves and bust, and a black scarf-looking thing that she has draped over her arms.

"Hello," Jongup greeted with great confusion.

"You looked a bit lonely, so I thought it would be nice if I gave you some company," the woman said.

"I'm waiting for my date, actually," Jongup explained, feeling too weird to describe Yongguk as his boyfriend. Did Yongguk want to be his boyfriend? They didn't talk that much on the subject.

"Oh you are? Wait, let me guess," the woman said, inspecting him.

Jongup felt a little bit uncomfortable.

"You're Junhong's date, right?" she asked.

"Hyosung, stop being nosy," he heard Yongguk said.

The woman – Hyosung – turned around and pouted.

"You never let me have any fun," she said.

"Sure I do. However, I don't think Sunhwa appreciates being left alone with your siblings and cousins," Yongguk told her.

Hyosung only rolled her eyes and walked towards where Sunhwa is.

"So who was that?" Jongup asked.

"Jeon Hyosung, my cousin on my dad's side of the family. She's completely harmless though," Yongguk told him.

Jongup only nodded his head and took a sip of his red wine. Bitter.

"There are other choices for you to drink, you know," Yongguk told him.

"I need to be classy. Drinking red wine is classy," Jongup stated.

"So is not making a face, but that doesn't stop you, does it?" Yongguk asked.

Jongup only rolled his eyes and set the wine glass down.

"There you are. Dinner is almost ready and your father is almost having an aneurism," an older, graying woman said, walking up to Yongguk.

"Why? Did he finally realize that the food he ordered was actually duck instead of rabbit?" Yongguk asked.

"Yes. He keeps saying that he didn't make that mistake, but you're father is only stubborn is all," she said. "Well hello. How are you?"

"Hello. I'm doing fine," Jongup said awkwardly.

"Mother, meet my boyfriend, Jongup. Jongup, meet my step-mother," Yongguk introduced.

"Oh! Well you can call me June. Most people do anyway. Yongguk never mentioned bringing a boyfriend to this party," June said, looking at Yongguk like she suspects something.

The two said nothing. They mostly stared at each other and Jongup grabbed his wine glass. The two drank from the glass and looked around.

"Well, I need to calm down your father. If he doesn't calm down, then lord knows that he'll have a heart attack within three months," June said, leaving the two alone and walked towards the kitchen.

"Your stepmom is nice," Jongup said, setting the empty wine glass down.

"She's much nicer than my mom, I'll tell you that," Yongguk said.

"Hm… how come your mom cheated on your dad and left?" Jongup asked.

"She said she wasn't happy at all with the lifestyle, and that my dad didn't show her the love and affection she wanted," he explained.

"And your dad let her go?" Jongup asked.

"He knew she was unhappy, so he did. The custody battle was brutal, but they decided that it was best fit to be with my dad, since my mom was the one that left and cheated. Anyway, it's your turn to tell me something," Yongguk told him.

"Well, my dad died when I was four years old and my mom didn't remarry. She said she didn't understand the point of remarrying someone with three kids already," Jongup explained.

"Alright everybody! Dinner is ready! We're also very sorry with tonight's menu. It was supposed to be rabbit stew, but we messed up, so we're having duck stew instead," June said.

Everybody gathered towards the dining room and sat down. Jongup sat next to Yongguk, who seemed to be a bit stiff. He looked up and saw a handsome man with a sharp jaw line and cat-like eyes looking over at them. A man was sitting next to him and he had big eyes and puffy lips.

"Who's that?" Jongup asked him.

"That's Himchan, my ex-boyfriend, and that's his fiancé Daehyun," Yongguk whispered to him, setting his napkin over his lap.

"Wait, your ex-boyfriend is getting married and you're making him jealous?" Jongup questioned. He doesn't understand the logic behind that at all.

"It's a lot complicated than you would think," Yongguk said.

"You're explaining this to me once we leave," Jongup told him.

\-----

Jongup took off his coat and set it down on top of Yongguk's couch.

"So explain. Why are you making your married ex-boyfriend jealous?" Jongup asked, looking at him.

Yongguk sighed and rubbed his tired eyes.

"Himchan and I have an on-again, off-again relationship. During our off-again time, he dates other men and tries to make me jealous as much as he can. He's also cunning and sly and he knows what to do to get what he wants," Yongguk explained.

"Sounds like my cousin. So why don't you just, I don't know, date someone new? It's obvious that Himchan doesn't really like you as much as you love him. He seems to be psychologically abusing you," Jongup told him.

Yongguk sighed. For a brat like him, he sure is right.

So now what?

\-----

Yongguk doesn't know why he's here.

He's at the mall. In broad daylight. With Jongup.

He doesn't remember the last time he's been to the mall, to be honest.

"I need new shoes and my brothers are too busy to take me out shopping. Since you're my pretend boyfriend, I think that it's only appropriate to shop with me for bonding experiences," Jongup explained. Again.

"I don't understand why you can't just order them online. It's more convenient and we don't have to deal with people," Yongguk complained.

"Shipping costs extra. And why would I order something if they already have it in the mall?" Jongup questioned.

"Like I said, it's convenient and sometimes they don't have it," he answered as the two walk into a shoe store.

"I can tell that you're not fun," Jongup told him, looking at the Jordan's on sale.

Yongguk only rolled his eyes and sat down, waiting for the younger to finish shopping. Out of the corner of his eye, he thought he saw someone move.

"Yongguk?" a familiar voice questioned.

Oh no. Yongguk thought.

"Yongguk! I thought I wouldn't see you here," Himchan greeted happily.

"I'm just shopping with my boyfriend is all," Yongguk explained.

Himchan looked over and saw Jongup comparing the shoes together and trying to decide.

"Charming," Himchan muttered, looking back at Yongguk.

"I never pegged you to be shopping here," Yongguk told him.

"I always frequent here. Which reminds me, I should go and meet Daehyunnie back at the food court. He hates it when I'm late. Toodles," Himchan said, waving goodbye to him.

Yongguk could feel his blood pulsing. He took a few deep breathes and tried to calm down.

"Hey, you okay?" Jongup asked him.

"I'm fine. Did you get whatever you're looking for?" Yongguk snapped.

Jongup only rolled his eyes. He must be used to this, Yongguk thought.

"I decided to go with the shiny black ones. They're simple, stylish, and they can match with any of my outfits," Jongup explained, holding the plastic bag in his hands.

"I thought you were saving money for Christmas," Yongguk said.

"I am. I take an extra twenty out for myself to spend. The rest goes into the Christmas fund," Jongup explained.

"Then I guess we should leave now," Yongguk said as the two began to leave the store. However, something caught Jongup's eye and was completely drawn to it.

"What now?" he demanded.

Jongup ignored him and looked like he was about to cry.

"I've been meaning to find this book, but they're always sold out. Now I don't even have the money to buy it," Jongup said, holding a book in his hand.

"What is it?" he asked.

Jongup held up the book and he read the carefully typed scripture 'The Night Circus'. It was a black cover, with a white hand extending out and on top of the hand was a red and white circus tent.

"So?" he questioned.

"Forget it. Obviously you don't understand," Jongup said, setting the book down and the two finally left the place.

The two began to make their way out of the mall when Jongup saw a photobooth.

"Let's go take pictures in there," Jongup requested, tugging at Yongguk's sleeve.

Yongguk sighed, but agreed. It was to keep him happy. It was the least he could do.

The two walked over to the photobooth and walked in. Jongup took out two dollar bills and inserted them inside the machine. He picked two random ones and saw the countdown to ten seconds.

"We need to do this right. Let's actually pretend we're a happy couple instead of one who doesn't want to be here," Jongup told him.

Yongguk agreed and decided to go along with it. Hey, if this works, then he could shove it in Himchan's face and get him jealous that way. That could work.

The countdown then went to three seconds. Jongup immediately wrapped his arms around Yongguk's neck and Yongguk wrapped his arms around his waist. It was a reflex. The two smile widely and was blinded by the flash. The countdown was now five seconds and Jongup made a face at the camera, which Yongguk followed right behind him. After taking three more pictures, Jongup pulled at Yongguk's collars and kissed him deeply. Yongguk kissed him back and pulled his body close to his. He heard a voice say that the pictures are done and to make their way out of the booth.

Yongguk let Jongup step out first. He followed right behind and took out the two strips of pictures that they took. He looked over them and smiled at them. Somewhere along the line, though, he began to take it seriously and actually smiled and acted goofy with Jongup.

"Wow, I'm surprised. Your acting skills are amazing," Jongup commented.

"Yeah sure. Acting," Yongguk said, noticing the small smile forming on his lips in the last picture.

Shit.

 

When the fire burns out  
And it's only me and you  
Shimmery lights outside  
They reflect your eyes  
As you say "I love you too"  
When the sun comes up  
And the snow falls from the roof  
I can smile because I spent my Christmas with you  
\- Christmas With You – Artist Vs Poet

 

Jongup looked over at the pictures from the photobooth. He smiled softly and felt his heart slowly skip a beat.. He placed them in a box and stuffed them in his dresser. His brothers don't need to know.

"What time do you go into work?" Jongsung asked him.

"In an hour. Why?" he asked.

"Some guy called and asked about you. I think his name was Yongguk," he answered.

Jongup furrowed his eyebrows. Why did Yongguk want to know what time he went into work? He shook the thought from his head and began to get dressed for his job at the library.

"Why did he need to know?" he asked.

"He said he wants to take you out somewhere. He wouldn't tell me where. He said he'll pick you up after work," Jongsung told him.

Jongup was a bit confused. They didn't make any plans that day. He shook the thought from his head and walked out of his room.

"Alright. I'll see you guys later," he told them, heading out the door.

"Be careful! Call us when you're heading home, okay!" Jonghyun called out.

Jongup slipped on his shoes and waved to them. He grabbed his keys and began to his journey towards the library.

\-----

The library was packed. It was in the middle of summer and it usually meant that it's now time for some daycare centers to open up. Meaning that Jongup is going to be extremely busy for the next three months. Which meant that he could get paid extra. Calculating the money he would receive from the library and the money Yongguk would give him, he could be able to buy his mom a birthday present in the fall.

That is, if Jongup would even allow Yongguk now.

For some reason, throughout the year, he's been feeling guilty about taking Yongguk's money and he has no idea why. Then again, he has been getting massive butterflies and sometimes would catch himself thinking or looking at the older man when the two are at the music shop (which he really needs to stop doing).

"Hey Jongup," one of the librarian workers greeted.

Jongup looked up and smiled softly at them.

"Hi," he greeted back.

"Hey, there's a guy with the kids right now and he says that he's picking you up for lunch," she said.

Jongup's heart began to skip a beat. He walked out from behind the scanners and walked towards the other room where they usually hold the kids until story time or lunch time. He walked through the doors and saw Yongguk reading a story to them from a random book he picked up. The kids seemed entranced by his voice and listened carefully to the story. Jongup could feel his heart beating against his chest. He didn't think that someone with this much influence would cause his heart to race this much.

After the story was over, the kids all huddled up to Yongguk and began to ask him questions and pulling him to come and play with them.

"I love your enthusiasm, but unfortunately, Yongguk is here for me," Jongup told the kids, who all squealed and ran up to Jongup and hugged his legs.

"They seem to love you," Yongguk commented.

"I like taking care of them. Most of them are the usuals, meaning that their parents drop them off when they're too busy at work and they need their kids to be watched over by someone," Jongup explained.

"Ah. So where do you want to go? I know there's a restaurant that you may like that serves American style food, as well as some other favorites that you like," Yongguk told him.

"Sounds delicious," Jongup said.

"It should be. Junhong kept raving about the food there and kept recommending that I take you there," Yongguk told him.

"Does it have anything to do with making your ex jealous?" Jongup asked.

"Nah. This one's for me," Yongguk said.

"Wait, is the Bang Yongguk actually asking me out on a date?" Jongup questioned, smirking.

He rolled his eyes and looked at him.

"If I knew you were a brat, I wouldn't have asked you," Yongguk said jokingly.

"Yes, but just remember that I'm your brat," Jongup said.

"Hey Jongup, it's time for your lunch break," his coworker told him.

"Alright," Jongup called out.

So shall we go?" Yongguk asked, offering his arm towards him.

"We shall," Jongup said, accepting his arm and walking out of the library.

\-----

Dinner was, surprisingly, pleasant. Yongguk was surprised that he actually enjoyed dinner with Jongup, since they connected more and talked about different topics instead of the awkward silence that he usually has to indulge with his past dates. They were mostly suitors that his parents arranged for him because they come from a much wealthier class than letting him date someone who was probably far more interesting.

"Yoohoo! Earth to Yongguk!" Jongup called out, waving his hand in front of Yongguk's face.

Yongguk playfully swapped his hand away from his face.

"I told you not to do that," Yongguk said, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

"You were staring off into space. I was wondering whether or not you knew how to drive this car," Jongup told him.

Yongguk could feel his cheeks tinge red.

"I didn't pass my driver's test six times, okay. I know how to drive," he blurted out. "And what's your excuse?"

"I don't have the money or the means to have a license. I mostly take the bus, anyway," Jongup told him.

Yongguk only snorted. Jongup rolled his eyes. He was about to turn his car on, but – on impulse – he grabbed Jongup by the collar and kissed him deeply. Jongup wrapped his arms around his neck and practically had to crawl onto his lap and straddled him. The kiss was long and deep, until Jongup finally broke away to finally breathe.

"What was that?" Jongup asked.

Yongguk was about to open his mouth, but closed it. Even he didn't really know what just happened. It just… happened.

"I… I don't know. Maybe I should-"

"No, I like it. However, maybe we should do this when we're not so cramped in a tiny car," Jongup suggested, placing his hands on top of Yongguk's chest.

"Yeah. Yeah, you're right," Yongguk said, adjusting the seat so Jongup could get to his own seat.

After Yongguk dropped Jongup home, he couldn't control his breathing or his heartbeat. Maybe this was what love was. Maybe Casablanca was on to something after all.

He's got a whole month planned for them, so he needs to prepare himself.

\-----

Yongguk walked into the house and placed his keys back onto one of the hooks. It was a very long day. He didn't think being with Jongup would be this tiring. Then again, this was the most fun he had in years. All he ever spent his time doing was going to stuffy parties his dad throws and then going to quiet and rather awkward dinners with Himchan. He looked at his calendar and saw that it was September 9th. It was his and Himchan's four year anniversary. To be honest, he hadn't thought of him in months.

He jumped from his thoughts when he heard the doorbell ring. He peaked through the peephole and saw Junhong, standing around and looking at the flowers. He rolled his eyes and opened the door.

"Sorry, I'm not buying anything," Yongguk said.

"Ha ha. Let me in," Junhong demanded.

Yongguk rolled his eyes and let him in. Junhong took off his shoes and let them near the door and entered inside the house.

"So can I ask why you're here?" Yongguk asked him.

"Sure. The reason I'm here is because you've been spending a little too much time with Jongup," he stated.

Yongguk raised an eyebrow.

"I am," he said, not exactly getting the point.

"I know it's not my business, brother, but the fact that the original plan was to make your ex jealous seemed to slip your mind. If I'm not mistaken, it seems that you've fallen in love with Jongup," Junhong told him.

Yongguk was stunned. He was not falling for Jongup. No way in hell. He just liked being in Jongup's presence. And the fact that he makes him feel all warm and gooey. And that one time-

Shit.

"Shit. Shit, shit, fuck, fuck, shit. This can't happen. That was not part of the plan," Yongguk muttered, running his fingers through his hair.

"Hey, calm down! You're gonna give yourself an aneurism," Junhong stated.

"I wasn't supposed to fall in love with him! This was not part of the plan! My plan was to get Himchan jealous," Yongguk stated, rubbing his face with his hands.

"It's only September. To be honest, I'm glad to see you like this. I don't think I've ever seen you this happy. With Himchan, it was more like a chore with him. With Jongup, it was like you wanted to be with him," Junhong told him.

Yongguk stopped and thought about it. He did enjoy being with Jongup. He remembered just last week, where Jongup made a terrible pun, but Yongguk still laughed. Whether the fact that it was extremely terrible or very clever, he didn't know. He just remembered enjoying it.

"Also, mom and dad want to know whether or not you're coming to their annual anniversary dinners," he said.

"When is that again?" Yongguk asked.

"In two weeks. They also want to know if you're bringing Jongup with you," Junhong said.

"I'll call them and tell them the details. I haven't asked Jongup yet. I don't think he wants to go," he said.

"Why would you be so sure?" Junhong asked.

"Jongup doesn't like being in a crowd, especially if it's people he doesn't know. Besides, the dinners are mostly stuffy and uncomfortable," Yongguk answered.

"Hm… You know Himchan is going to be there, right? He broke off his engagement with Daehyun. Well, more like Daehyun did. He thought the two of them were moving too fast, so he broke it off. They're still dating, of course," Junhong said.

"They're still dating, yet Daehyun broke up the engagement? Does he know that Himchan is practically using him?" Yongguk questioned.

"Probably. He knows about your guys' history. He was surprised about how you two were together for three years. He wondered why you two didn't get engaged," he said.

Yongguk only shook his head. He heard the doorbell ring. He got up and made his way towards the door. He found Jongup standing behind the door. He flashed a smile and let the male inside.

"Hey Junhong," Jongup greeted.

"Hey. I gotta go. I need to run some errands, and then head on to the university. I'll see you later," Junhong said.

The two waved goodbye to him. They heard the doors closed.

"Sorry I'm a bit late. I keep forgetting that you live far," Jongup apologized, taking off his jacket and setting it down on the couch.

"It's no problem. My movie collection is in the other room," Yongguk said.

Jongup followed him towards the entertainment room. He's always surprised by how large the room is. It's spacious and it reminds him of a movie theater, with large beds and a projection in the room. He entered inside the room and sat down on the bed.

"Do you have a preference?" Yongguk asked him.

"Pacific Rim," Jongup said automatically.

Yongguk chuckled. "One action movie with monsters and robots coming up."

He disappeared out of the room and Jongup stayed. He looked around the room and inspected it a bit. The beds were bouncy and comfortable. He turned the projection on and pressed play. He settled next to Jongup and let him cuddle to his side.

About halfway through the movie, Jongup felt Yongguk unconsciously move his thumb against Jongup's exposed skin. He looked up at the older and appeared to be unaware of what he's doing. He moved on top of Yongguk and straddled his waist. Yongguk looked completely surprised and placed his hands on the younger's hips.

"You need to tell me now. Is this real or not?" Jongup asked.

"Jonguppie-"

"No, tell me now. Is this real or not?" he demanded.

Yongguk was silent. He thought back to the months that they were together. And at that time, he didn't think once of Himchan.

"Real. Completely real," Yongguk told him.

"What about Himchan?" Jongup asked.

Yongguk only shook his head.

"He doesn't matter anymore. I only care about you. I think it's always been about you. Forget the deal and forget the entire thing. I only want you," he told him, caressing the young man's cheek.

Jongup broke out into a smile and kissed him hard on the lips. With the movie forgotten, then two created their own little heaven. Filled with bliss and love and want.

 

Now I hope you're happy with yourself,  
'Cause I'm not laughing  
Don't you think it's kind of crappy  
What you did this holiday?  
When I gave you my heart,  
You ripped it apart  
Like wrapping paper trash  
So I wrote you a song,  
Hope that you sing along  
And it goes,  
"Merry Christmas, kiss my ass!"  
\- Merry Christmas, Kiss My Ass – All Time Low

 

Jongup arrived to Yongguk's apartment thirty minutes earlier than expected. He thinks that, since with traffic and everything, that they should get there earlier. He hoped that Yongguk didn't mind.

He walked up to the steps, scrapped his shoes off from the snow that's coming down, and used the key he borrowed from Yongguk and opened the door. He walked in, placing his shoes next to the others. He missed the extra pairs of shoes that were next to the door and walked in. He closed the front door and made his way towards the house, seeing if he could find Yongguk in this maze.

After a few minutes of wondering, he heard voices through the other door. He furrowed his eyebrows and listened closely in. He could hear Yongguk's voice perfectly, but the other he couldn't quite make out the owner.

"-Look, I get it, okay? You can stop now," the familiar voice said.

"Stop what, exactly?" Yongguk asked.

"You damn know what. Don't you dare play stupid with me," the voice said.

Jongup peaked through the crack the door and the wall made and peaked through. The male was slimming and tall, with dark brown hair and piercing brown eyes and a chiseled jaw so sharp that it could cause a paper cut. He recognized the man instantly. The man was Himchan, the man that Jongup was hired to make jealous. Then Yongguk said that Himchan didn't matter anymore and called it off, declaring the two together.

"If you know what it is, just say it," Yongguk challenged.

Jongup furrowed his eyebrows. Then his eyes went wide. He saw Himchan walking closer to Yongguk, placing his hands on the front of his jacket, caressing his face gently.

"I know you're only using that poor boy to get me jealous. There's nothing for you to hide that fact. To be honest, I thought that you were actually in love with the boy," he said.

"His name is Jongup," Yongguk corrected.

Jongup feels really uncomfortable and he's not sure if it's because Himchan is so close to Yongguk or the fact that Yongguk isn't really pushing Himchan away from him.

"Right, whatever. Anyway, it worked. I'm jealous and I want you back," Himchan told him.

"What about your fiancé? Daehyun, wasn't it?" Yongguk asked him.

"What he doesn't know won't hurt him. Besides, I can have two men at once, can't I?" Himchan asked.

Jongup peaked in and felt his insides burning. He's praying, begging for it to be some sort of lie. Anything. However, Yongguk said nothing and stared at his former lover.

"You know that's not fair to Daehyun," Yongguk said.

"And what you're doing to this poor boy is? You may think I'm a shitty person, but darling I do it ten times better than you and in a more fashionable manner. At least I don't string my victims any farther than it needs to be. The fact that you're playing with this young boy's heart is so cruel," Himchan told him.

Yongguk said nothing. Jongup wanted nothing more than for Yongguk to defend him, to say that he's wrong and that he's in love with him. Just anything to stop his heart from breaking and shattering into tiny broken pieces.

"What do you want, Himchan?" Yongguk asked.

He didn't hear Himchan say anything. He looked through the crack and he felt his heart drop.

Himchan planted a soft kiss against Yongguk, wrapping his arms around the elder's neck. Jongup felt the tears burning against his eyes. It wasn't so much that Himchan was kissing his boyfriend, but that Yongguk seemed to be kissing him back. Yongguk placed his hands on Himchan's hips.

Jongup had enough. He banged the door open, tears already pouring from his eyes. Yongguk broke apart and saw Jongup standing in front of the doorway. Jongup saw regret, hurt, and worry cross his eyes. He shook his head and began to walk out of the house.

"Jongup wait!" he heard Yongguk shout.

"Get the fuck away from me," Jongup shouted, exiting the house and already feeling the bitter air piercing through his skin.

"Wait, please hear me out!" Yongguk pleaded.

"Get the fuck away from me. I can't believe I let someone like you use me like that. What kind of person are you?" Jongup hissed, not even bothering to stop.

Yongguk quickly grabbed his arm, but was quickly shoved away from him.

"Don't fucking touch me. What was I to you? Huh? Did you really mean it when you said Himchan didn't matter? Or the fact that you're in love with me?" Jongup demanded, his eyes filled with anger and hurt.

"It wasn't like that-"

"Then what was it? Huh? Your little play thing to pick up when you're bored and then to put down when you've had enough? I knew I should've trusted my instincts about you. You're just like the rest of these rich pricks. All you care about is your enemy and getting something that once belonged to you. So fuck you and get the fuck away from me," Jongup shouted.

The people on the streets began to stop and watch the scene.

"Please, let me explain-"

"I'm done with you and I'm done with this relationship. Fuck you and your fucking fake love for me. I can't believe I spent my free time with the likes of you. Keep your fucking money. I don't want it anymore," Jongup stated.

He turned around and began to walk back home. It was a mistake. He knew something was wrong when someone as rich as him asked him out. And now he wants nothing to do with him.

\-----

Yongguk laid down on the floor, looking at the pictures of him and Jongup doing stupid things. Jongup liked taking the Polaroid pictures and gave him some of the extras.

"Yongguk? Where are you?" he heard Himchan call out.

Yongguk quickly stuffed the pictures in a drawer and stood up. He dusted himself off and walked out of his room.

"Oh, there you are," he said.

He turned his head and saw Himchan smiling at him. The same smile that's supposed to give him butterflies in his stomach and make himself smile.

Now he feels nothing.

Nothing at all.

"Hey. Why don't we go out somewhere," Yongguk offered.

"Good. I'm starving. First, let me text someone," Himchan said, opening his phone up and began to text someone.

Yongguk said nothing. He knew who he was texting. He walked out of the hallway and walked downstairs. He need to talk to someone. He needed to vent. He grabbed his cell phone and texted Junhong real quick.

"So where are we going to eat?" Himchan asked.

"Why don't we stay in and eat? There's plenty of food here to eat," Yongguk suggested.

"Why? When there's something already prepared at a restaurant? Come on, Bbang. I thought you knew me better than that," Himchan said, putting his coat on and leading the elder towards the door.

"I just thought we could cook something together-"

"Yongguk, now is not the time to argue. What I'm craving is something that can be made at a restaurant. Now let's go," Himchan said.

Yongguk sighed and decided to willingly follow him. Where were the butterflies that used to have when he was in love with Himchan? Why doesn't his heart skip a beat when Himchan smiles at him.

"You're staring. I know I'm gorgeous, but we'll be late for our dinner reservations," Himchan told him.

Yongguk said nothing and followed behind him and walked out the door. This wasn't what he wanted.

He wanted Jongup back.

 

Don't come home for Christmas.  
You're the last thing I wanna see  
Underneath the tree.  
Merry Christmas, I could care less.  
\- Yule Shoot Your Eye Out – Fall Out Boy

 

Jongup quit his job. He couldn't stand being in that record shop as Yongguk. It was bad enough that he agreed to be part of his plan, but the fact that he lied to him and played him along made his heart hurt even more. He applied for an art supply store, somewhere where Yongguk would never step foot in. He got the job, of course, and made a bit more than his job at the record store, but it wasn't enough. He spent so much time with Yongguk that he almost forgot his responsibilities to his brothers and mom.

He had to give up working at the library because of it. It broke his heart that he had to give up the one job he wanted, but he had to. He had to work full-time at the art supply store, or else they wouldn't hire him.

Which is where he is now.

Jongup stared at the bills in front of him. There's no way that his mom was going to pay for this. His brothers have been pulling their weight to bring as much money into the family as much as they could, yet what did Jongup do? Oh that's right. He pretty much flirted with a rich man that's been using him to make his former significant other jealous. He was so stupid to think someone like Yongguk would like someone like Jongup. He shook the thought from his head. From now on, he should be focused on his jobs, to focus on pulling his weight to pay the bills.

Just then, someone knocked on the door. He got up and walked towards the door.

"You got that, Jonguppie?" Jongsung asked him.

"Yeah!" Jongup answered, opening the door.

Outside was Yongguk, leaning against the door frame. Any other time, Jongup would feel excitement running through his veins. Now? All he feels is disgust and anger.

"What do you want?" Jongup hissed out.

"A chance to explain," Yongguk answered.

"I'm pretty sure that little episode back at your house was enough for you to explain," Jongup stated, about to shut the door in his face.

"Wait, please?!" Yongguk pleaded out.

"Jongup, who is that?" Jongsung asked, looking past Jongup's shoulders to see who it is.

"No one important. They were just leaving," Jongup answered.

Jongsung could hear the bitterness in Jongup's voice.

"Why don't you help Jonghyun out with the cooking? He needs all the help he could get," Jongsung offered.

Jongup only nodded his head and made his way towards the kitchen where his older brother was busy cooking something. Jongsung, however, turned his attention to Yongguk, who looked scared and desperate.

"Hello," Jongsung greeted bitterly, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Hi?" Yongguk greeted back questioningly.

"Don't show your face around here, got it," Jongsung told him.

Yongguk was confused. He didn't understand.

"Look, its bad enough that you lied to our baby brother, but breaking his heart? That's unacceptable. Don't show your face around here and Jonghyun and I won't beat you until even plastic surgery won't fix it. You may be a handsome man, but you have an ugly heart and I hope to god that you won't find love ever again," Jongsung told him.

"Please, hear me out! It was never my intention to hurt him. I just want his forgiveness back and to do something for him to cover up the mistakes I've made," Yongguk said.

"I'm sorry, but even with all the money you have won't fix a broken heart. Find someone else to throw your cash at. As a matter of fact, why don't you shove your wealth and love to that Himchan person you tried to make jealous by using Jongup. I'm sure he'll love that," Jongsung told him, slamming the door in Yongguk's face.

Yongguk groaned and ran his fingers through his hair. He left and began to walk towards home. He needed to think right now.

\-----

Jongup was restacking shelves from the art store. He placed the paintbrushes inside the tubes and the spray paint in a locked shelf.

"You're moving pretty quick, you know," Youngjae, his manager said.

Jongup weakly smiled. "Thanks."

"I know this isn't the most ideal place to work in, but it works. The boss says that if you keep continuing to do a good job, then they'll possibly offer you a raise," Youngjae said.

Jongup brightened a little at that. If he gets a raise, then he can be able to afford presents for his siblings and possibly use half of his paycheck to pay for the Christmas tree and decorations.

"Youngjae!" a familiar voice greeted.

Jongup froze. He turned around and saw the same lanky kid, the same black mop of hair, and the same bright smile.

Junhong.

"Junhongie! I wasn't expecting you until next week," Youngjae greeted.

"I need new spray paint for my new skateboard. And a couple of stencils," Junhong said.

Jongup tried to make himself invisible to the items and avoided being anywhere near him.

"You should get yourself some new employees. You have so many stuff here. It sucks that you're the only employee here," Junhong told Youngjae.

"I'm not alone. Management hired another staff. He was here a few minutes ago," Youngjae said, looking around to find Jongup.

Jongup was in another aisle and continued to restock the shelves.

"Oh, there he is!"

Jongup was not exactly good at hiding.

He looked up and saw the shocked expression on Junhong's face.

"I need to make a few calls. I'll be right back with the spray paint," Youngjae said, placing his hand on the taller male and went to the back.

Jongup was now left alone with his ex's half-sibling.

"You work here now?" Junhong asked him.

"Please don't tell Yongguk. I don't want him to know," Jongup pleaded.

"I swear. I won't say anything to him. Why are you working here?" he asked.

"I didn't want to see Yongguk. He's start pleading with me and asking me to get back together with him and make up some stupid excuse. I don't want to deal with that," he answered.

"So you quit your job at the library? You love working there," Junhong pointed out.

"He knows too much. I don't want to see him right now. Not after what he did," Jongup said.

Junhong sighed and leaned his back against the shelves.

"He said he really misses you, by the way. He always drunk calls me about he how fucked up and how he says that you won't take him back. You won't, will you?" he asked.

Jongup thought about it. He broke his heart so much. He doesn't want to deal with him right now.

"I don't know. I don't even know what I want right now," Jongup confesses.

Junhong sighs and gently soothed his back.

"I promise I won't tell him, okay. If you want to get together with him again, that's fine. If you don't, then that's fine, too. You deserve someone who looks at you like you're the sun to them," he said.

Jongup only nodded his head. The problem was that it was how he felt with Yongguk; like he was his sun and Jongup was his moon.

"Hey, I got your spray paint. I didn't know what color you wanted, so I took a guess," Youngjae called back, walking towards them.

Junhong smiled brightly at the older male. Jongup noticed that it was the same look that he would give to Yongguk.

"The blue color is fine, thanks. Do you think you have green or yellow?" Junhong asked.

Youngjae took out two different spray cans and handed them over.

"You know me so well," Junhong said, looking at the items.

"Thanks. Do you need anything else or are you good?" Youngjae asked.

"I need a new sketch book. One with the hardcover," Junhong said.

Jongup walked towards where the sketch books were and grabbed one with a hardcover and gave it to him.

"This is perfect. Thanks. I should pay for these," Junhong said awkwardly, walking towards the register.

"I better go ring him up," Youngjae said, walking up to the register.

Jongup mused to himself. He noted that the two seemed to like each other, but he doesn't know how far along into the relationship they're in. He didn't bother himself too much with it and continued to stack the shelves with the art supplies with paint brushes and some brown hard thing that was too thick and hard to be cardboard.

"That's maconite," Youngjae said.

Jongup turned around and raised an eyebrow.

"What you're holding, it's called maconite. Painters mostly use them because it's so smooth and clean cut, as well as how the paint looks when it's used," Youngjae explained.

Jongup only nodded his head and carefully placed the maconite where it belongs.

"It's time to clock out. The boss has your paycheck, by the way," Youngjae told him.

Jongup only nodded his head and walked towards the back to receive his paycheck.

After work, he began to make his walk towards home. He feels so empty now. He misses the library. He misses working with kids and books and helping people find the right book for them.

He misses Yongguk, too.

 

Wish as I may, wish as I might  
Grant me this one small wish  
On Christmas night  
‘Cause I don’t need candy  
Or the toys from my youth  
I just want you, oh darling, I just want you  
I'm not Grinch  
I'm not Mr. Scrooge  
My heart just needs your light  
The only thing I’m doing  
Is crying in my room and singing  
I wish my baby would be with me  
Tonight  
\- Wish List – Neon Trees

 

"I fucked up," Yongguk admitted, staring at his chocolate milkshake.

Junhong said nothing. He only took a sip of his green mint tea milkshake.

"You should've pushed Himchan off you," Junhong stated.

"Not helping," Yongguk stated, using his straw to mix the milkshake.

"Wasn't trying to. Look, you fucked up. You got what you wanted, right? Himchan is back in your arms. Wasn't that really the point?" he asked.

Yongguk thought about it. Sure, it was part of the plan, but when he spent time with Jongup, he felt like every trouble he ever had just disappeared. He stopped thinking about Himchan. He stopped thinking of his own future of the music store company. All he thought about was being with Jongup, to hold him in his arms and to never let him go. He still remembered that night where they made love together. It was warm and they were cuddled together. One thing led to another and they were in Yongguk's bed, giving him sweet kisses and cooing at him. He made sure that he didn't hurt the younger.

"I don't want Himchan, though," Yongguk admitted, placing his chin on the table.

"What do you want?" Junhong asked, already knowing the answer.

"I just want Jongup back."

Junhong said nothing and took a sip of his milkshake.

"I can kind of figured that. I have never seen you that happy since… Actually, I don't think I've ever seen you that happy. The only time that I've seen you remotely happy was when dad said that you don't have to marry that pretty girl next door, since she ran away with some other girl from a neighboring town," Junhong said.

"What do I do?" Yongguk whined, sitting back up and resting his back on the cushiony chair.

"Well first, you need to stop pouting. Second, dump Himchan. He makes you completely miserable. Third, do something for Jongup. Do something completely unexpected. Remember, Christmas is next week. You better think of something fast," he said.

Yongguk sighed and only nodded his head. He looked up at his brother and saw something flash in his eyes.

"You know something," he said.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Junhong said, taking a sip of his milkshake.

"You know where he is," Yongguk said, picking himself up.

"I may or I may not. Either way, he doesn't want to see you. You broke his heart. It's the reason why he quit his job at the music store. Fuck man, it's the reason why he quit his job at the library. He knows that you know where he works. He wants to be left alone right now," Junhong told him.

Yongguk sighed and knew his younger brother is right.

"I'll leave him alone. I hope he finds someone that sees him like the moon; glowing all through the night and the light in the dark," Yongguk said.

Junhong only hummed in agreement.

Suddenly, Yongguk perked his head up.

"I know what to do!" Yongguk shouted.

Everybody in the restaurant stopped and stared at the strange man who just shouted.

"Don't hurt yourself," Junhong said, already used to his older brother's embarrassing ways.

"Shut up brat. Don't ruin this moment for me," Yongguk said.

Junhong said nothing and paid for their drinks and food.

\-----

Jongup hates it here. He hates working at the art supply store. Sure, he got a better raise than he did at the library or the music shop combined, but it's not the same.

He misses the smell of old books, of fresh ink. He missed the kids that would hang out at the library. He misses taking care of the kids for the summer program. He misses the books that he got to read. Now he feels guilty of stepping inside there, like he's returning to the scene of the crime.

"Hey, you look a bit down," Youngjae said.

Jongup looked up and gave him a weak attempt of a smile.

"I'm fine. It's nothing, I promise," Jongup told him.

Youngjae seemed skeptical.

"Look, I know working at an art supply store is the last place anyone would ever work in. Tell me why you're here and why you're not at a job that you actually want to work at," Youngjae said.

So Jongup told him everything. About Yongguk, about their supposed relationship, about the plan he figured out, and why he's here.

"So you took the job to get away from your ex?" he asked.

Jongup sighed and nodded his head. Youngjae placed a hand on his shoulder.

"He was a dick. You don't deserve someone like him. You deserve someone that will treat you right," Youngjae said.

Jongup smiled softly.

"The thing was, though, was that he did treat me right. He treated me so right that I kept thinking that it was a dream, that somehow this wasn't real. Is it still sad that I still love him even though he did so much shit to me?" Jongup asked.

Youngjae shook his head.

"I don't think it's sad. Maybe he did love you, but he got confused when this Himchan person showed up out of nowhere. I'm not justifying what he did. My question is; what if he showed up out of nowhere and apologized to you. Would you accept the apology?" Youngjae asked.

"You two! Get back to work!" their boss said.

The two jumped and quickly went back to working around the shop.

\-----

Yongguk stared at the picture of him and Jongup together, laughing in a photobooth together. Yongguk smiled softly at the memory. It was probably two months into their relationship. Jongup begged him to take a picture in the photobooth, which he didn't really understand at first. Maybe it's a privilege of being rich or something. He agreed to it, mostly because he knew Himchan was around the place and he thought it was the perfect thing to try and get him jealous. It didn't work. Instead he began to fall in love with him.

"Babe? Are you in here?" he heard Himchan call out.

Yongguk stuffed the picture in one of the drawers and stood up.

"Yeah, I'm in here," Yongguk called out, stepping out of his room.

Himchan stood in front of him, wearing a clean cut suit and his hair styled up.

"Good, I thought we were going to miss this party. If we hurry now, I won't have to face your parents," Himchan said.

Yongguk only nodded his head. He grabbed his keys and followed behind Himchan. Junhong's words were floating around in his head. He ignored them and walked out the door.

"I hope your parents don't ask me about Daehyun. It's already awkward having to explain to my parents why our engagement didn't work out, but having to explain to your parents? I don't think so," Himchan said.

Yongguk mostly ignored Himchan and walked towards his car. He beeped it one and the doors were open.

After a few minutes of driving, they were finally at his parents' house. They entered inside the house and already he was bombard from his aunts and uncles. What happened to Jongup, how did he get back together with Himchan, and if Jongup is now out of the picture. It began to make his head explode.

"Merry Christmas Eve," his father greeted.

Yongguk went in for a hug and felt his father pat his back. He let go and placed his arm around Himchan. His father had a look of shock, but ignored it and walked away to do something else. Yongguk was now left alone with Himchan, who seemed to be talking with other guests and complimenting their outfits and such. He needed a drink. Something that's hard and would make him forget easily.

"I'm going to steal my brother for a while," Junhong told Himchan, grabbing Yongguk's other arm.

"Go ahead," Himchan said, letting Yongguk go.

Yongguk followed Junhong somewhere on the other side of the room.

"I needed to get you away from there. You looked like you were ready to kill Himchan any moment," Junhong said.

"I was about to, to be honest. I need some hard liquor," Yongguk commented, placing his hands on his hips.

"You should break up with him right now. Do it and I'll bid you some time with the folks. You need to go to Jongup and soon," Junhong told him.

Yongguk has been thinking of that and practicing to how he would tell Himchan everything he's been feeling. He suddenly felt something heavy being placed in his hands. He looked at what Junhong gave him and saw a wrapped present that he was going to give to Jongup.

"I found that in your room. I suggest you do this now," Junhong whispered to him.

"Hey, Junhong. Thanks for inviting me," he heard an unfamiliar voice greet.

Junhong turned around and his face broke into a bright smile. Yongguk recognized that smile. That was his 'I'm so in love with you' type of smiles. His face even lit up a little.

"Hey, Youngjae. This is my brother, Yongguk. Yongguk, this is Youngjae," he introduced.

Youngjae smiled politely to him and extended his hand out to him.

"It's very nice to meet you. Junhong said only positive things about you," Youngjae told him.

Yongguk gets the feeling that there's something more, but he decided not to get into it.

"There you are! I was telling your aunt about the weekend we would be spending," he heard Himchan say.

"You made plans without telling me?" Yongguk asked him.

"Well, of course I did. You wouldn't do anything romantic with me, so I decided to take the plunge," Himchan explained.

That's it.

"Himchan, it's over. Forever. I don't love you anymore and I don't think I ever did. Go back to Daehyun and go make his life miserable because I'm done with you and I'm done with your psychological abuse," Yongguk told him, grabbing his jacket off the rack.

"And who do you think would love you as much as I did? Don't you forget, Bang Yongguk, that I was the one that found you in that sorry state back in high school. Who do you think is going to love you now?" Himchan demanded as he raised his voice.

Yongguk looked at him square in the eye.

"Me," he said as he walked out to the cold and December night.

He was going to start loving himself like Jongup loved him. And he was going to do this right.

 

Christmas is coming, so don't buy me nothing.  
I got what I wanted, I got what I needed.  
And Christmas is coming, so don't buy me anything.  
I got what I wanted, I got what I needed. It's you. It's you. It's you.  
\- Nothing For Christmas – New Found Glory

 

Jongup woke up to something, or someone, knocking on their door. Jongup sits up and sees the Christmas tree shining brightly with the many different colors, which a few presents underneath the tree. His looked around the room and saw his mom sleeping on the couch and his two older brothers sharing the pullover mattress from the other couch. Jongup took the air mattress. He got up and walked towards the door, where the knocking continued. He opened the door and saw Yongguk standing there, wearing a crisp black suit and what looked like uncomfortable footwear. Jongup was about to slam the door in his face, but he soon stopped the door.

"Please!" Yongguk pleaded.

Jongup rolled his eyes and glared at him.

"What do you want? Here to break my heart a bit more?" Jongup asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"That's not why I'm here. I know I fucked up, and I completely understand that you won't forgive me. The truth is I am in love with you. I'm so in love with you that the things you used to do that annoy the shit out of me are the things that I miss the most. The fact that whenever you smile makes my heart skip a beat. That you always make me the happiest whenever you're around me. I fucked up, I know that, but my feelings for you are real. And that kiss back at the house was a mistake that I wish I could take back. I'm so sorry," he said.

Jongup raised an eyebrow.

"Was that all?" Jongup asked.

Yongguk took a deep breath.

"Remember one time when we went to the mall and you were looking at the cover of the book? And I practically had to drag you away? And you always mentioned that book whenever we were in passing?" Yongguk asked him.

Jongup froze. He only mentioned it once to Yongguk. The book was called The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern. A copy in Korean was extremely rare to come by. Which was why he always cherished the book in the library whenever it was returned. He would by his own copy, but they're extremely expensive and it's money that he doesn't have.

Yongguk reached into his bag and took out a very clean wrapped present. The wrapping was a crimson red that had little penguins on them with a scarf and a Santa hat, with a green and red ribbon tied onto it. Yongguk handed the present to Jongup, which he stared at it like it was a bomb.

"I can't accept this," Jongup stated, already feeling foolish for not getting his jacket.

"I want you to. I know I've been an extremely shitty boyfriend, especially towards the end, but I do care about you. At first, it was about the stupid plan, but then I got to know you. I got to know the little things about you. How you prefer chocolate over vanilla because you hate the plain flavor of vanilla. How you used to have a passion for dance, but it was too expensive for you so you switched on over to books. You said books were your safe haven, that you would do anything to be working there for the rest of your life. I can understand that you don't want to be anywhere near me, but at least accept this gift. I was going to give it to you for Christmas, but then…"

"Yongguk, you're rambling," Jongup softly said.

"I know," he said, extending the present out to him again.

Jongup accepted it and held the present in his hand. He tore the wrapping apart and froze. He touched the cover gently, biting his lip.

"I… I can't accept this. This is way too expensive. Besides, I didn't get you anything," Jongup said, looking up at him.

"You don't need to get me anything. All this time I've been trying to make someone jealous when really, you're the one I really needed. You're all I ever wanted, to be honest," Yongguk confessed.

Jongup felt his cheeks burn. He clutched the book close to his chest.

"I broke up with Himchan. I told him that I never loved him. I told him that I'm in love with you. I kind of blew that chance, though," he said.

Jongup opened the cover and saw that the book was signed by her.

"You know that this doesn't change a lot, right? You still broke my heart," Jongup stated.

"I know. I want to make it up to you. So with the book, I made this for you," he said, holding out a construction paper pamphlet.

Jongup accepted it and began to flip through. They look like coupons.

"One free back massage? You suck at them, though," Jongup told him.

"Who said I was going to do it?" Yongguk asked.

Jongup bit his bottom lip, trying to suppress a smile.

"I'll accept your apology. One condition, though," he said.

Yongguk perked up a little.

"You have to be honest with me. What you did was completely shitty and unforgiving. Yes, I went with your stupid plan, but you sort of cheated on me. That doesn't really fly with me."

"I'm willing to start over with you. We can forget everything that we both did. I can pretend to be that douche-y rich guy that began to make your life miserable if that would help," Yongguk offered.

Jongup smiled softly. He remembered that so vividly.

"We don't have to. We can pick up where we left off before Himchan and the plan barged into our lives," Jongup said.

Yongguk took off his coat and wrapped it around his shoulders. Jongup was a bit surprised.

"You're shivering. I don't want you to get sick," Yongguk told him.

Jongup's heart began to beat a little faster. He pulled the jacket over his cold body. He could smell Yongguk's faint cologne and something that smelled like mint.

"Where were you from before?" Jongup asked.

"I came from a party at my house. It was completely boring, though. My parents went on and on about how I should get married and have children right now. What were you doing?" Yongguk asked him as they began to walk around the block.

"I just woke up when you knocked on the door," he said.

Yongguk and Jongup continued to walk in silence. Jongup cuddled up to Yongguk for warmth. Yongguk wrapped his arm around the younger, kissing the top of his head softly.

"I want to show you something," Yongguk said, grabbing Jongup's hand and lead him somewhere.

Jongup followed right behind me, feeling the snow seep inside his slippers. He should've changed quickly, but he didn't know what was happening.

Yongguk lead him towards and brushes the snow off his hair.

"You should've told me to dress warmly," Jongup muttered.

Yongguk ignored him and the two finally made it to the park. Jongup has passed by there plenty of times before. He doesn't know why he's looking at a bunch of snow covered trees.

"And the show starts in three… two… one," Yongguk said.

Suddenly, the lights began to turn on. It began to illuminate the entire park and Jongup gasped in amazement. He never saw anything as beautiful as this.

"I remembered you saying that you always wanted to see the park light up," Yongguk said.

Jongup didn't know what to say. He hugged Yongguk tightly around his waist and didn't let go.

"I'm sorry for everything, Jongup. I was telling you the truth that what I'm feeling for you right now is real," Yongguk told him, wrapping his arms around the younger.

Jongup said nothing and kept holding onto Yongguk. He feels like if he blinks, then he'll wake up in my mom's house, sleeping on the air mattress, with his brothers telling him to get his ass up. He finally looked up at Yongguk and saw Yongguk looking at the lights. He soon turned his head and look at the younger.

"If I kissed you right now, what would you do?" Jongup asked him.

"Probably kiss you back," Yongguk murmured, brushing his lips against Jongup's.

Jongup pressed his lips against Yongguk's and wrapped his arms around his neck. The two finally broke away and looked at each other in the eyes.

"So. Best or worst Christmas?" Yongguk asked.

Jongup hummed and played around with Yongguk's suit shirt.

"It's a tie. Maybe next year you'll ask me that question," Jongup challenged.

Yongguk smiled and pecked his lips.

Challenge accepted.

 

Ho ho hopefully this holiday will make us believe that  
We're exactly where we're supposed to be  
And we're ho ho hoping that  
We all come back and as a matter of fact I know  
We're exactly where we're supposed to be  
Together by this Christmas tree  
\- Ho Ho Hopefully – The Maine


End file.
